Monday, November 07, 2005

Mall of Flies and Pads

Yes, can you believe that this souk-freak finally ventured to the Mall of the Emirates.
It looks nice, drove straight up to the highest level and thoroughly enjoyed the huge parking lot, enabling myself to park close up to a pillar on one side inverting my side mirrors with the hope that Mr.Dinger would not find me and do my other side.

Inside. Yes I got inside and went to the loo, just incase I didn't find another for a few hours. It looked really nice and there were a few cleaning ladies buzzing around. The cubicle was filthy. I had to roll my trousers up to my knees as you do in Doha airport to avoid 'sponging' up the floor with them. And there were worse items lying around aswell. Perhaps there could be some public awareness program on TV explaining what these huge bins in public restrooms are for.....WHAT? you are not with me? OK.....sanitary pads have a sticky side so they adhere to your panties so they don't flip out of your knickers as you hop onto the escalater. The sticky strip is NOT to attach them to the back of the bathroom door after no no....naughty naughty. Cos guess what? the cleaning lady does not look behind the door. So after a mammoth cleaning task I set out to see the rest of the mall.

I found flies. Lots of flies. I was in despair and went to St.Moritz cafe next to skidubai. It was lovely. I was excited. I got seated. Yummy...ashtrays...goody goody, I can have a smoke too. Menu arrives. no food. HUH. She said food will be on the menu tomorrow. Shucks, after my cleaning job I was in need of some form of nutrition. I chose the hot chocolate since I was pretending I was at the slopes. It was lovely. I burnt my tongue on it in a desperate bid to drink it before the flies did. I smoked a few aswell, but no use. The flies were here to stay. Waitress said pest control had been spraying all night. Now I know what happened to their food.

Off I went to Ronalds for some minced chicken knuckles. They had no running water so various drinks were off the menu. I never knew (DUH) that they filled their coke machines from the tap....ugh. I overheard in the food court that pest control are still on their way to the least the bathroom cleaner had arrived.

Ok, last chance to find something yummy. I found it. Marble slab ice looked like my kind of place. Without much thought I chose the rocky road in a cone. This has to be the closest to heaven (with some flies of course). I Love all the mini marshmallows in rocky road. don't you? well don't go there. Half way through, and no sign of a white dot. I dug and delved with my tongue until i felt the spongy texture of the long awaited mallow. Yes THE mallow. ONE huge marshamallow. As i sucked on it, the whole lot came out of the cone, down my shirt and was covered in a layer of flies within seconds.

Thats it. Back to Meena Bazaar for me.


moryarti said...

thank you for that educating, enlightening and slightly over-informative bit on sanitary pads dynamics ... :P

BuJ said...

cannot add much to moryarti's sarcasm about how fascinating it is to learn all these facts about feminine sanitation. My favorite was the fact that cleaners are not aware of things stuck behind the door!

what happened to your blog? why are they deleting all these blogs? who did u piss off? am I next?

CG said...

Moryarti- I knew you would love that, thanks for reading.
Buj - what happened to YOUR blog?

Anonymous said...

Dincha save yer blog?

Back up! back up! (We never do that at our agency--it's so pessimistic.)

Who dun it anywayz?

P.S. I work right next to Gold and Diamond Park (near Police Muroor at 4th Interchange) so I walked over to the MoE (not Ministry of Education) the other day. Someone dropped me at the T-junction first (near Intercoil). A herculean burst of speed and courage took me across the road without being flattened (that was after a fruitless 5-minute wait for "opportunity"). Then it was a 5-minute stroll to the mall, where I spent exactly about 15 minutes. 10 of them in Carrefour, looking for "Valiant". Seemed nice. Big. Bright. Still unfinished though. Didn't see nothing to complain about.

Other than the fact that I can't take my family there yet, not until they get perhaps Number 92 to roll through there on the way back as well. We could use 12, but there's that road to cross.

BuJ said...

oye.. what happened to my blog? last time i checked it was online with no new visitors.. no change there :D

I'll write soon.. quality not quantity... got back from work and just enjoying a coke with ice now...

BuJ said...

el condo.. how do you back up a blog? is it easy?

by the way in the random word verification window i got to type a word with a 'u' and two dots on top.. somethin German or Nordic.. I don't have the keys!!

moryarti said...

Like this? :)


BuJ said...

Let me guess.. this is probably your nick on msn :p

CG said...

you guys are positively mad

(html code Ü)

CG said...

& # 2 2 0 ;

moryarti said...


its a copy/paste from 'Word' using the Symbol tool in the Insert menu ..

faster and easier than coding - me too lazy

Mansour said...

what an honest and truthful article about the hyped-up mall of the emirates. I wish the rest of the world and duabiians can see this as a more honest portrayal of the mall's opening, instead of reading falsified information in the media about how great it is. I can also tell you that they had advertised September 2005 as the opening, and when they realized they fell short of the due date, they deliberately opened up the few shops and claimed it was open.

I am not in dubai right now, but will be so soon..and then I will be more regular on visiting your blog.